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The other day, I started in on a 1500 piece puzzle — carefully sorting and matching edges, unaware of time or responsibility. Then later, I dipped myself into a hot bath when it was still light outside. This last week, I’ve drunk copious amounts of decaf coffee while doing these things, and other slow, unhurried activities. I read this book. I cracked open both a new one of these and this; while spending what other time I had left reflecting and preparing for 2023.1
Such is the week when you forget your name. And, what day it is.2 But, the best part of this week is that it leads up to the one thing I always look forward to.
New Year’s Eve.
I hope you don’t think any less of me, but — it is my favorite holiday.3
It’s not as if I’ve ever gone out and done anything particularly special on the eve of a new year. After we’ve pretended that the clock has struck midnight for our kids — blowing noisemakers and cheering — my husband usually falls fast asleep as I count down the final seconds on my own.4 The charcuterie is mostly eaten, and gold balloons and confetti are usually strewn about the house, which I refuse to touch or clean for days. The lights on our bare Christmas tree twinkle and dance on the surface of the gold star that sits upon it.
It’s beautiful. It’s silent. And, it’s holy.
But also, I am not alone.
As this is when I have the overwhelming sense that everything that was… eagerly grabs the hands of everything that is to come — both of them waltzing together to time. Our beginnings are nothing without our endings, after all—the perfect pair.
The truth is, I don’t think the new year is as much a fresh start as we envision it to be. And, that’s okay. Instead, it’s a moment when every version of ourselves converges — forming a magnificent tapestry of layered life — a cloud of witnesses testifying to the trials, victories, and nuances of who we were and are and can be.
We remember our tenacity. We remember our resilience. We remember that these traits mean everything when partnered with who God remains — the same.
Hope rekindles.
From Midnight to 12:01 a.m., we become more than willing to embrace the knowledge that with Him, anything is possible. We believe that even on our worst days, He still uses us and is with us. He works in and through us. He’s still moving us forward when by all accounts5, it looks as if we are standing still.
New Year’s Eve isn’t meant to be a performance review, but a reminder of God’s sovereignty. And, His timing. It’s a chance to exchange our earthly perspective for a Kingdom one — to zoom out past our brokenness and see the wholeness that is to come.
That has already.
Our vision is limited. It is obscured by our humanity and often, fear. And life, well, it’s like an endless puzzle we’re eager, sometimes desperate, to put together. But, we can only handle one piece at a time — slowly and carefully, feeling its edges out and becoming overly familiar with it, wondering if we’ll ever find its counterpart to match. Meanwhile, the Lord sees the entirety of its placement and significance.
Perspective changes everything.
We’re rushed. He’s steady. We’re anxious. He is peace. We measure our life in heaping cupfuls of shame. He pours it out — and then covers it with mercy and grace.
What might our future hold if we planted ourselves in the knowledge that it’s already been secured? How might that change our pace? How might it impact our posture?
Puzzles don’t begin broken but whole. Someone’s already seen them put together. There are no missing pieces. No timeline we’re required to uphold. We’re free to work on the parts we’ve been entrusted with and commit the rest to the Lord.
If there’s one thing I know now more than ever, it’s that we can enter into this next year accepting that what’s ahead of us is already known. And, believing that what is behind us cannot and will not be wasted. It is all already perfectly pieced together.
Eventually, we will see it to completion.6
With this, we can live fully in this present moment — exactly where our feet are.
Alongside you,
Tabitha
If this resonates with you, consider sharing it with someone who may need it too.
And, in case you missed them — you can go back and read these Honest Guides:
△ Slow Dancing in a Burning Room
△ There is Hope Even as We Name the Ruins
△ the Longest Shadow on the Shortest Day
I applauded my husband for remembering to take the trash out. Because seriously? Is it Wednesday? Or, Thursday. How would I know? Please don’t ask me.
Am I still allowed to be called a Christian for not saying Christmas?
Then, I wake Ethan up and force him to take a picture with me even though he’s barely awake. I also get my NYE kiss. He promptly drifts back asleep as if it’s never even happened.
Always ours.
New Years is my favorite holiday too!! So much reflection and anticipation. :) Hope this is one of your best! Also, thank you for sharing the reflective questions. They're so thorough and helpful!! Happy New Year!
I loved this whole post and resonate with it entirely. Especially “we become more than willing to embrace the knowledge that with Him, anything is possible”. Thanks for sharing this, friend! Happy New Year!